The Lonely Island - I Just Had Sex

I should be studying neuroscience, but this made my night.

I present to you the delightful new single and music video from the Lonely Island. So honest. So genius. It also features cameos by Jessica Alba, Akon and Blake Lively.



Some lyrical gems from this song:
"It felt so good when I did it with my penis."
"And I called my parents right after I was done."
"'I'm so humbled by a girl's ability to let me do her because honestly, I'd have sex with a pile of manure."
"She kept looking at her watch - doesn't matter, have sex! But I cried the whole time - doesn't matter, have sex! I think she might have been a racist - doesn't matter, have sex! She put a bag on my head - still counts!" #KKKmask

Priceless.
Come on now. After you had sex, I'm sure you want to sing it out loud too.
Now you have the perfect anthem for it.

Flashback

Even when I was a baby, I was a baller.

Give us money, we are pretty.

My friend Rana bought me "Sex and the Single Girl" last summer as a present (well, she also wanted to read it herself). It is written by Helen Gurley Brown, the former editor-in-chief of Cosmopolitan magazine. The book advocates confidence and independence and encourages women to experience sexual relationships without or before marriage.

Perhaps it’s not a secret, but I dig musicians – the ones who grace concert halls or tiny venues with their urban bohemian look, mastery of instruments and appreciation for art and music. Trace my dating history and this is predominately who you will find. Unfortunately, most warn you to stay away from certain musician types: the edgy, emotional flakes that have gaggles of women at their disposal.

via Maniac World
To be honest, this picture doesn't really have to do with the book and relationships. Because as much as I like money, I don't want to be paid for a relationship. That would be considered prostitution - i.e. things that are slightly frowned upon. 
 But I'm focusing on the "we are pretty" part. #girlpowerbaby

Sometimes I fancy myself Wonder Woman – not dependent on any man. Using a mixture of sass and sarcasm and sincerity to capture someone’s attention but asserting my independence. But sometimes it’s difficult to ignore feeling a little hurt when someone perfects his disappearing act or makes you feel disposable or keeps you as an option, but not a priority. 

I'm still dating around. It has been relatively successful, but there has been some damage and mess along the way. For one or both parties involved.

But the book has been enlightening. Encouraging. Empowering.

That's right. Nobody puts Asian in the corner.

Mixtape Monday

Forty handwritten notes and mixtapes for each of my residents. #mybabies

I know. I'm destroying the very industry I want to work in someday. But welcome to what David Gallagher calls the golden age of the mix CD and the golden age of copyright infringement.

But he continues to say that “there’s nothing quite like the feeling of getting a package and knowing that someone out there took the time to make this.” And because tastes are so idiosyncratic, each mix is a “carefully crafted window into a person.” I certainly think so. It is ultimately the fruit of someone’s labor and time – a gift. Even if most of the music is not to my taste, I have never thrown away a mix that was given to me.

Anyway, I've said this before, but I'm all about Rob Sheffield and his thoughts on mixtapes. There are numerous kinds of mixtapes for every conceivable occasion, and there is always a reason to create one. The technology might change – as we go from cassettes to CDs to flash drives and back again– but “it’s a fundamental human need to pass music around, and however the technology evolves, the music keeps moving.”

Happy Sunday

A little eye candy for your Sunday afternoon.

B&H Dairy Serves Up Vegetarian Goodies for Cheap

Yes, I'm still in mourning because the glorious little Asian Pub is shutting down soon. That place truly is my first horcrux, but I did find a new place to insert a fragment of my soul.

Well, it's not quite the perfect substitute. No bargain booze. But it is another haven for hangover food and broke college students.

B & H Vegetarian Restaurant is easy to miss – it blends in with the little storefronts on Second Avenue. But once you step inside, you are immediately greeted with the scents of soups and 80 other kinds of goodness.  It has the feel of a divey diner - cozy, cheap and oh-so-delicious.

via Flickr

 Most plates are under 10 dollars and the cook will fill you up with heaps of food. The array of choices on the menu can be a little overwhelming at first. Salmon croquettes? Blintzes with a side of soup?  The cheese pierogis are a must. The cheddar cheese and apples omelet is also a safe bet. But there are about nine different omelets to choose from, in addition to more than 10 overstuffed sandwiches and different specials each day.

via Flickr

Mike is the friendly cook who’s bustling around behind the counter – he’ll encourage you to keep on eating and feign heartbreak if you don’t finish what’s on your plate. So say hi when you’re sitting at the counter, but prepare to brush elbows with strangers left and right. And expect to be taunted by the strategically-placed carrot cake in front of you. Even when you’re full, you’ll still wonder what that tastes like.

Gluttony never looked so good.

The love child of an art gallery and a bar.

As Frank Bruni said, "With notable exceptions like long-distance running, any-distance driving and matters of personal hygiene involving sharp blades, most activities go down easier and happier with a drink in hand."

Whenever the ARC Gallery has a fundraiser or exhibition opening, I usually get to play hostess and bartend. Red and white wine. It’s the usual fare.

But now here’s your chance to drink to your art on the LES anytime. With the Four Loko ban and Asian Pub closing down, I think it's time we fight Prohibition in every possible way.

Culturefix - 9 Clinton Street

"Culturefix is a bar, gallery and event space. Offering workshops, gallery openings, parlor games and live performances, Culturefix invites lovers of the arts, food, drink and design to merge."

 Panda - 139 Chrystie Street

"It's like your best friend's living room with a bit of serendipity thrown in..."
Panda is a European-style cafe/bar with organic coffee, teas and free Wifi by day, Happy Hour by night.

For more drinks with a view, check out the rest of the New York Times article via the Tipsy Diaries.

Anyone fancy a gallery crawl this weekend?